2016

Happy New Year!

We celebrated New Years' Eve with the Hutchinsons - good college friends we hadn't seen in 4 years!!  We are blessed to live only 20 minutes away from Chet's brother's current home, and so we joined their families for a hotdog bonfire.  It is a special gift to pick up where you left off with like-minded friends and to be encouraged in life and faith.  Thank you Chet and Erin!

This New Years' Day began for us as the night ended, rocking Cuatro through tears and unknown pain.  He slept most of the night in 10-minute increments, requiring constant pacy holding and soothing.  Hubry slept on the floor so that Cuatro and I could share the bed, but overall sleep was sparse for all.  I vaguely remember hearing the loud fireworks ushering in the New Year, and I quietly thought to myself, "it is here."

When the morning finally came to relieve us of our misery, it was greeted by a cold, steady rain.  Raindrop's asthma had kept her awake some of the night as well, Songbird seemed out-of-sorts, and Hubry quickly made the call that we would be staying home from church this day!  And with that began a sweet time of remembering, dreaming, planning, singing, feasting, and now...writing.

When I look back over 2016, I see many gifts and trials and accomplishments, but what stands out the most is Cuatro himself.  He was longed for, prayed after, and realized in January.  He spent the next 8 months blossoming in my womb.  He finally joined us in this pilgrim journey early September, and he finished out his "fourth trimester" just as the year came to a close.  He has added so much joy to our family, I can't imagine life without him!

This afternoon we sat around the fire, steady rain falling outside, offering up our thankfulness.  From 2016 we are thankful for:

Cuatro
The Peach Book - the culmination of 9 years of dedicated work.
Christ Community Church has been a blessing for everyone: Sunday school, Bible studies, small groups, bells and children's choir. We became members in August and have enjoyed being able to participate in a community so close to where we live.
Lots of time with cousins (at the beach, in the mountains)
A dry basement and attic. (thanks, DaddyO).
Fires. And lots of free wood, courtesy of our neighbors Nancy and Ken, cut into wood-stove sticks by Paul Wagoner's amazing hydraulic splitter
Chickens. We wanted to get out of rabbits and into chickens now that our yard is more accommodating, and what do you know? Our rabbitry friend Tom wanted our rabbits back, and gave us 10 poulet de bresse chicks in return, augmented by another friend of a friend's 5 leftover chickens. Minus 6 rooster dinners, we have 9 lovely hens who make a racket and lots of eggs.
Running - Songbird has dropped her 5k time dramatically and has been running better than she ever has. Bro continues to do well, and Raindrop ran her mile diligently with the promise of winter gymnastics in view. Kelly ran her first 5k just 6 weeks after Cuatro arrived, but opportunities have been sparse of late.

9 years in the making!

Self-portrait in the bathroom :)

And on the porch

Isn't it great to be the youngest of 4?

Songbird's artwork

BRO practicing his whittling skills

New Years' Dinner - the beautiful table brought to you by little Raindrop.

The First Weeks

Cuatro is one blessed babe to be born into such a community!  First off, he has rock-star Grandparents who lovingly stepped into our world and took over all of our driving duties so he didn't have to get carted about here and there with the older children.  BMa and Daddy-O came to stay while we were in the hospital and our first few days at home.  While they weren't driving the older children to their various activities, BMa was busy doting on the children and helping with their schoolwork and art projects, while Daddy-O went around fixing all of our broken things (mainly doors and tables).

BMa and Daddy-O left us on Thursday, and then my friend Amy came to swoop away the older children on Friday and take them to a special Homeschool Day at the History Museum.  This allowed Hubry and me to take Cuatro to his first doctor's appointment together without having to bring the other children along.  And, this allowed the older children to play with good friends and practice making new inventions (which they practiced for many days afterwards using all the contents from our recycling bin).

That first weekend home by ourselves the church provided several meals for us, which was a huge blessing, and then on Monday the children started their first day of Masters' Academy.  On Tuesday GranJan and Papa RJ came to dote on the children and take over all of our driving duties.  When they weren't driving the older children to activities, GranJan held the baby and read to the children, while Papa RJ mowed our grass and went around vacuuming up all of our messes.  Did I mention that Cuatro has rock-star grandparents? :)

We are still being provided meals from our church and help from our friends, and Hubry and I have taken many moments to reflect and marvel at the way God has specifically answered our prayers for community in this city.  When we moved to Kennesaw everything about it felt off - the University wasn't exactly the kind of place Hubry had pictured teaching, the suburban living with all of it's new cookie-cutter developments wasn't where we pictured living, and our church situation - though super encouraging - was disjointed at best as it required driving across town into the city every Sunday.   The Lord has either changed our hearts or changed our situation in each of the above complaints,  and He has provided generously for our wants as well as our needs.  Cuatro is testimony to this generosity, and we recognize fully that it is nothing short of gift!

I've got this big sister thing!

Shades of blue

Brotherly love

First day of Masters'Academy

Enjoying a soft changing pad from Lindsey

First bath, and no tears!

September 5th, 2016

The Birth Story of Cuatro
8:48 a.m., September 5, 2016

Wifey and I went to bed early on Sunday night, September 4. She had been tired and often nauseaus even in this third trimester of pregnancy, and we had hosted small group earlier that day. So I made some overnight waffle mix for our Labor Day breakfast, and we were in bed between 9 and 10 o'clock, which is early for us. At about 5 in the morning, Kelly woke me. "That was the fourth time that a hard contraction has woken me up tonight," she said. "I'm wondering if I should stay awake for a bit and time them." She went to the bathroom, and I thought, well, I might as well get ready, just in case it's time to go to the hospital. It's not that early. When she saw me getting ready, she thought, well, maybe I should start getting ready, too. This, it is good to say, was a direct answer to prayer: we had asked that God would let us know when it was time to go, that it wouldn't be too rushed. And he did!

About thirty minutes later, when our bags were pretty much packed, the contractions were literally stopping her in her tracks, and she was pretty confident that it was time. I started calling people to see who could come take care of the children. Wes had to stay with his children because his wife was going into work. Abe didn't answer his phone (we learned later he thought he'd forgotten to turn off his alarm for Labor Day). Nancy didn't answer her phone (we learned later she thought it was a telemarketer). Eric and Teresa didn't answer (we learned later they had been sick and were sleeping in for labor day.) Kelly had another very hard contraction, and we looked at each other. "We need to go," she said. She started writing a note for Songbird to read, and we left my phone by it so she could call us and us her. Some days before, Kelly had it on her heart to go over with the children what to do if they woke up and we were not there, and we had actually practiced using the phone. Another way in which the Lord prepared us for the unknown.

So by 5:45, we were on our way to the hospital, not sure who we could get to take care of the children. We checked in around 6am (another benefit to an early morning labor day delivery: no traffic), making sure that everyone knew just how fast Kelly's deliveries typically are. We got into triage and confirmed that, yes, Cuatro was definitely on his way, and they'd have us in a room shortly. 

When they entered information into the computer system in order to prepare Kelly's intravenous port, the nurse suddenly turned around. "You had an IV here a year ago today," she said. We looked at each other. What had she been in the hospital for? The dilation and curettage in the aftermath of miscarrying our fifth baby, exactly one year to the day that Cuatro would be born. We knew, of course, that Cuatro was a gracious answer to prayer after the sorrow and pain of losing that fifth child. But it seemed extravagant to have his life echo so precisely his little sibling's death. A kind of calendarial expression of Psalm 126, "They that sow in tears shall reap in joy." 

While we were waiting for a room, I finally got in touch with someone: Amy, who said she was on her way. Later, she told us that when she arrived at the house, Songbird and Bro were already up and had calmly started making waffles. Songbird, as is her custom, had arisen first and, finding no adults in the house, suspected a baby -- even before seeing the note we had left for her.

Things started to be pretty difficult for Kelly around 7:30 or so, and the approach of the midwife and nursing staff was to keep very quiet and let her labor -- presumably because she had done this a few times before. But to Kelly, it felt like the longest, hardest labor yet, although it was done in less than four hours from the time that hard contraction awoke her. After much pain and pushing and more than a little screaming and weeping -- Kelly was amazing! -- we saw his scuzzy little head, and then suddenly the rest of him. 

Our first impressions: Blue. Stout. Quiet. Indeed, he was coughing up stuff he had breathed or swallowed in that delivery for the next several days, and they had to do lots of vigorous rubbing to get him to cry. And he was here! And all was well. As he's gotten older, he's stretched out a bit, and now reminds us a little of Bro's head on Songbird's body. Nursing has been a little of a struggle at times, but all things considered he has been happy and healthy and Kelly is recovering well. 

Answers to months of the faithful prayers of all his older siblings.  What do you say at the birth of your fourth child? A superabundance of offspring, an embarrassment of progeny, a loud, chaotic lifetime of feeding and cleaning and teaching and worrying and praying and laughing. Little Cuatro has a lot of hands blessing him everyday, and we're overflowing with thanksgiving.

FIVE

My Little Raindrop is 5!  As I sit up late in bed, timing my contractions and wondering whether or not I will know in time if I'm in labor, I think about you and how you've been my littlest cuddle companion for the past 5 years now.  This morning you ran into our room, climbed into bed with us and announced, "It's me, Raindrop!  I love you Mama!  I love you Papa!"  Then you commenced to dote on us the best of your hugs, kisses, and smiles.  And I marveled at your joy and brightness.

I think if I had to choose one word to describe you, it would be bright.  Of course you have the regular 5 year-old fits and tantrums, but in general you light up the room with your constant joy.  I know this, because while brother and sister are spending hours each day working outside on their mud wall or bamboo fort, you are quietly enjoying the time inside with me.  "Mama, I am an inside girl," you say.  And though you are strong and brave and athletic, you prefer quiet indoor activities.  I don't blame you as your sweet blood seems to attract all the mosquitos in the entire town, and your sensitive lungs seem to be allergic to every other blooming thing around.  At least the latter of the two ailments I hope you will outgrow.  But you've grown wise about the bugs - wearing your long-sleeves in the heat of Summer as a protection.  

I've always felt like 5 was such a turning point - growing from preschool to school-aged.  I marvel at how much changes between 4 and 5, and how much more independent you have grown.  A few months ago we listened to The Hobbit on a long road trip together, and when the story was over you found our illustrated copy of the book and carried it around for a week - narrating all the parts of the story that corresponded with one of the pictures in the book.  It was the first time that you really got into the story and connected it with an actual book on our shelf.  For your birthday I bought you a beautifully illustrated copy of Winnie-the Pooh, since it's another of our favorites to listen to on the road.

You have also become much more engaged during our school reading times, and offer your own lovely narrations of the stories read aloud.  This is one of the great joys of schooling at home - being a witness to the magical and mysterious connections that take place in the early years of learning.  There is so much wonder and awe, and you are so unapologetic as you take it all in.

We have been hosting a Sunday night small group at our house every other week, and last week Papa was in charge of the children's lesson and play time.  After everyone had left and you children were tucked away in the bed, Papa came to me and said, "Wifey, this is the first time that I've seen little Raindrop really play soccer.  And she was good.  I thought to myself that she had raw, natural talent and instinct when it came to attacking the goal."  I don't know what will come of that, as we've never played on any teams, but for now it's something fun to keep our eyes open to as we play with the goals in our yard!

You are also a lover of beauty, and often the first to recognize or point out the beauty around us.  When we are preparing to share a meal with guests, you can't wait to choose a tablecloth, set the table, and pick a bouquet of flowers.  You pay such attention to detail in these matters, and I truly appreciate your tender care for others in this regard.  It is indeed a unique way that the Father has fashioned you in His image.  We pray that it will be something that continues to pour out of you towards others, and not something that you hope to store up for yourself.

We love you dearly, and can't wait to see what this next year holds for you, especially as you surrender your role as youngest sibling, and take on the responsibility of helping us to cherish your little brother. 

I love you more, than you ever will know.  From the top of your head, way down to your toes!

Edisto Beach

The Hoovers invited us to join them at the beach again, and it couldn't have been better timed.  After our busiest semester since coming to Kennesaw, we were more than ready to escape the mundane rhythm of work and life at the new homestead, and embrace an extended Sabbath rest.  There was very little checking of e-mail and using of technology (aside from looking up good books and posting some Instagram photos), and a lot of reading, writing, painting, fishing, and beaching, and visiting.  It was lovely.

One of the beautiful things about coming back to the same house on the same beach year after year (a blessing I never experienced growing up), is watching the cousins grow in maturity and friendship.  Every morning, by 6:30, the boys were awake and down by the lake fishing.  This time they could independently carry on in their adventures without the help of the adults, and they could pretty much stay down at the lake fishing all day (with only a few interruptions for eating and beaching).  It was remarkable.

The girls had their own sweet thing going on - rotating between listening to the Wingfeather Saga, building forts, fishing, and general imagining together.  Saturday night I had the privelege of walking to the pizza shop with the two older girls, and it was such a delight to hear their chatter - planning birthday parties, talking about their friendship, dreaming about a 10 year-old canoeing adventure with their Mamas.  I am overwhelmed with God's faithfulness to us, and with the beauty He is weaving together within our children.

Miles and Raindrop definitely march to the same creative drummer - listening to stories together and rolling around in silliness. They have their own unique thing going on, and I hope it can continue as they grow older.  It's fun to see a shift taking place - where Raindrop can flow in and out of the big girls' play, and Miles in and out of the big boys' play.  I am convinced there is something special that happens when brothers and sisters grow up in close friendship with their cousins.

Baby is Owen is not so much of a baby anymore, and it was delightful to see the older children taking turns pulling him on the boogie board and making him laugh.  He is growing into his own fun, playful, adventurous, opinionated self, and it made us all look forward to meeting baby brother in just 3.5 months!

I also look forward to the return of our India relatives, and more cousins growing in friendship together!

Baby bump 

Sibling love

Green-shirted brother-n-laws

Silly cousins

Beautiful, amazing sis-n-law

Family rest

Grandparent fun

sweet girls!

Ocean splashing.

Display

At the end of our school year last year, I did nothing to acknowledge all of the Art that was produced at Masters' Academy.  We were preparing to buy our first house, packing things away in boxes, and generally not in a displaying state of mind.  I always regretted that, as the children worked so hard on their pieces, and they were just shoved away in a box never to be re-opened.

This year I decided that as soon as school was over I would work diligently to discover some creative way of displaying all their art from the year.  I wanted something that would not hurt the paint, or put too many holes in the wall, something that looked beautiful, and something that could be taken up and down and reused.  I thought through a lot of options, but I finally decided to go with relatively cheap black foam display boards and mavalus tape.  I am not sure how long we will leave the displays up, though I want it to be at least through the Summer.  

There is something so significant in taking time to remember the work we have done and appreciating the things we have created.  I want the kids to enjoy walking into the library every day, and to look on the walls and smile as they remember this past year of learning.

This is how they hang together on the wall.

NINE!

I do not want the Summer to begin without acknowledging that my eldest child, the first-born of my womb, is now 9!!!  That is one year away from double digits!

When I think about the ways she has grown and changed this past year, the word that stands out to me is "settled."  Settled can be defined as adopting a more steady or secure style of life.  What I love about this definition is the way it balances work and choice with rest and security.  Over and over again, you have a daily choice to adopt - that is the work part of the definition.  And as a result of the work of adoption, you have the gift of security and steadiness.  

This reminds me of the Biblical idea of Shalom - an idea of peace and wholeness.  It is a direction all Christians are facing, and a destination that can only be reached in Christ.  I have seen our Songbird move towards Christ and wholeness in so many ways this year.  Not that it has always been a continuous upward trajectory (we have had our moments), but that at the end of the year she has reached a much more settled spot than when she began - a spot with more and more echoes of Shalom.

One of the things that has grown peace in our Songibrd is her love for reading.  She was a bit older when she began to really dive into independent reading, though she would always sit for hours listening to a good story.  And now that the world of imagination has opened up for her through reading, I have seen her take initiative and develop new tastes and passions - things she has chosen on her own - apart from us.  I just love watching this growing independence, seeing her uniqueness blossom, listening to her share a good story she just finished reading to her brother and sister.  The gift of story has such a settling effect (so long as it isn't too scary), and it is a joy to watch Songbird set out on her daily story adventures. 

Another thing that has grown peace in our Songbird is friendship.  She has many far-away friends whom she loves dearly as sisters, but since our move to Kennesaw, finding local friends has been a harder process.  I have been so thankful for our bi-weekly writing co-op where sweet Ruth has taken Songbird under her wing.  Even though Ruth is 4 years older, she truly enjoys spending time with Songbird, and offers so much wisdom along with a positive example of what it looks like to grow up in Christ.  Her sister Ella has also been a blessing, and the entire writing co-op gang.  I feel like taking time to read as a large group, breaking bread and sipping tea together, fishing and playing at the lake has been a wonderful bi-weekly rhythm for all our children.  And if they've learned something academic on the side, that's great too :)

Songbird has also grown in peace through music.  We were able to give her official piano lessons this year, and she loved every minute of it.  I'm pretty sure I never heard her complain about practicing or going to lessons.  In fact, she often spends 30 minutes at a time coming up with a new song or a new set of chord progressions.  Singing has always been a source of comfort and joy for her, but now she can add piano to the mix.

I am so honored to be this strong, creative, imaginative farm-girl's Mom.  The other day Hubry was walking with Songbird through the woods, telling her that she was always welcome to live in our home if she wants, so long as she contributes to the work of the home.  She said our yard was too small for her, that she would work for several years as a vet, save up her money, and move to a large farm.  Then we were welcome to move in with her, so long as we helped out on the farm. :)

Songbird, we love you!!!