I never can say what I mean

I love this song by the innocence mission.

the innocence mission / brotherhood of man from LAMP on Vimeo.

"I never can say what I mean," Karen Peris sings near the end, "but you will understand."

Tonight on the town green there was a kid's music concert, a lady named Ann(?) singing lots of folksie and silly songs. Bro wanted to wear his chicken suit, for some reason, so we arrived with picnic blanket and backpack, and Bro a chicken. Suddenly as we walked down the sidewalk, and Bro saw the others gathered on the long, he stopped, stuck out his bottom lip, and began walking backwards. Maybe he was the only chicken? Still not sure what made him feel so sad. He seemed to feel better as the night went on -- he got to play a washboard, and other percussion instruments, and even moved up to the front with the other kids.

And then it was time for Ann to sing her "what do you want to be when you grow up?" song, and she started crowdsourcing the lyrics. "Does anyone know what they wants to be when they grow up?" she asked. "You want to be a what? A what?" She looked to another adult. "I can't understand . . ."

That's when I saw it was Bro. "Come up here and tell me," she said. Bro ran up to within a few feet and shouted something. "A what?" He tried again. "I can't understand him." she said with a befuddled smile, and carried on. Bro turned and started toward us, and seeing me, burst into tears and ran.

After a while, when he could speak again, I asked him what he had tried to tell her. "A good pharaoh," he said. Which was true, of course. He's been dreaming of being a good pharaoh when he grows up for several months now -- it's one of his favorite roles in dress-up with Songbird.

So it's understandable that Ann didn't get it -- she was looking for "policeman" or "fisherman" or "doctor." But it was also this picture of the painful loneliness, the failure to connect, that is so much a part of our sojourn. Haven't we all wept -- perhaps only inside -- when misunderstood?

And to anyone concerned about the future of America or the world, I wouldn't worry too much. In about twenty years the good pharaoh will be ready to take charge.

[posted by Tom]